I'm Responsible for This 🙋🏼‍♂️

Well, I finally made it.

The big two-three. Jordan year. 23 trips around the sun. Whatever you want to call it.

Yep, you guessed it. A couple days ago I turned 23 years old (wow, I feel old just typing that haha). And seriously, blessed is an understatement.

The past few birthdays, I’ve taken the time to reflect on lessons learned from the previous year and what I want to accomplish in the year ahead. Kind of like the new year when you think about it.

But this year, I decided to try something different. Instead of “23 lessons for 23 years” (which let’s be honest, would just be long and boooooring) I want to share with you the single biggest thing I learned last year that has completely changed my life.

Ready? Okay, here it is:

You're in control of your own life. 

Seriously, that’s the most important lesson I learned over the course of this past year. And here’s why.

The reality is, we just can’t help but compare ourselves to other people from time to time.

Whether it’s a fancier car, a bigger audience on social media, more money and fame and fortune. Whatever it is.

But the thing is, you can’t control any of those things. You have no say in how much money someone else makes or how much they look like they’re “living the dream.”

Because at the end of the day, there’s only one thing you can control:

How you act and how you react.

That’s literally it. You can’t control the weather. You can’t control what happens to you or others. You can only control what you do and how you react to situations when something doesn’t go your way.

A hard pill to swallow is if you’re not where you want to be in life… it’s your own fault.

I know it sounds harsh, but it’s true. At least that’s how I see it.

Here’s the thing. The world isn’t conspiring to get you. Sure, life can be hard. But most of the time the thing that makes it hard (or at least much harder) is ourselves and the things we do or don’t do.

Let’s take me for example.

I’m nowhere near where I want to be in life. Don’t get me wrong, I’m grateful for everything that I have and I’m proud of all the progress I’ve made thus far.

But I long for more. Much more. I dream big. I have these massive goals. And I’m determined to get there someday.

I’m not there yet. So sure, I could blame the system. I could blame God. I could blame everyone else around me.

But the thing I’ve learned is… that just does nothing good for me. Sitting around and blaming others doesn’t get me to where I want to be in life.

The only way I’m going to get there is if I take responsibility for my own life, take responsibility for my own actions, and actually put in the work to get to where I want to go.

Simple as that. And difficult as that.

Because it can be easier to blame others and just sit and pray that things will change. But that won’t do anything. Because the reality is…

No one is coming to save you.

You are the only person who can change your situation. You are the only person and thing you can control in this life.

How you act and how you react.

Taking full, complete, 100% responsibility for my own life has been the best thing I’ve done.

It’s uncomfortable. It’s hard and challenging at times. But man oh man is it worth it.

You just have to own up to it and take the first step toward changing how things are. That’s literally the hardest part. The first step.

Stop focusing on those around you and start focusing on yourself. If you aren’t where you want to be, start focusing on what you have to do to get to where you do want to be. And then take a step.

Then another. And another. Soon enough, you’ll look back at all your progress and realize just how far you’ve come.

All it takes is a bit of courage, a desire for change, and a determination that somehow, someway, you’ll get there.

Never stop dreaming,

Connor

❓This Week’s Question

What's one piece of advice you would give your younger self?

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📚 This Week’s Resource

20 Things I Learned in My 20's

Great reminders for a young lad who has no idea what he's doing or where he's going but knows it will all work out in the end (okay fine, it's me).